This is my rough draft completely unedited. For a full explanation go to Part I.
Today – Part VII – Rough Draft
“I need to go to the little girls room.” Willow told Kael.
“Yeah sure go ahead.” Kael always gave people persmission even when they weren’t really asking for it. He supposed it was a nervous habit of his. He wanted people to feel at their ease, and do what they wanted around him.
Willow stood and headed for the nearest person of the wait staff to ask where the bathroom was. Kael couldn’t keep his eyes off of her. He was still unquestioningly in love with her. Then she turned a corner and he could see her.
Something hit Kael. Fear it was certainly fear. Seeing her walk out of the room was enough to let in the fear of loss that he had been fighting back all day. He didn’t think he could ever handle losing her…. again.
Carinen was beyond a joy in Willow and Kael’s life. Every time they looked at her even after her second birthday they were overwhelmed with gratitude. Although Willow had vowed never to have another birth, things turned pretty quickly when baby fever hit. They were back where they had been just over two years ago. This time a baby boy popped out and the impossible was witnessed by Kael.
Kael’s whole world just became brighter. The multiplication of his life when Carinen was born was repeated. Kael was in awe that it could just keep happening. They must be the luckiest couple in the world he thought to himself over and over. He gave God thanks that he was blessed with the life that he had.
It soon became hard to be grateful for anything.
Little Levi’s birth was hard on Willow and she was sentenced to bed rest for over two months to recover. She did recover, Kael helping out around the house as much as he knew how. He and Carinen grew much closer in that time.
“Mommy needs to stay in bed with the baby.” Kael didn’t know how many times he had said those words to Carinen. It was a big change in her life but beside a few tantrums, was taken well. As long as Kael would now take up Willow’s post on the floor as they played with toys.
Willow did get better and about three months after the birth of Levi she was in the mood for a little more ice-cream. The dollar store was just down the road and Kael suggest that she go ahead and he could stay home and watch the kids. Kael wanted to give Willow a little alone time. She got about five minutes of alone time collectively a year. Willow didn’t want to leave the new baby, but Kael finally talked her into it.
Kael held the little one and Carinen played around with her toys. Levi woke up and Kael thought now would be as good of a time as any for a little tummy time. It was always fun. Levi was holding his head up surprisingly well for his age and between the dog and Carinen he had plenty to entertain him. Carinen thought that he was her baby and cared for him accordingly. She would make him imaginary tea. Feed him empty spoons and crowd toys around him as he lay on the floor looking at her with eyes, you weren’t sure could really understand what was going on.
It was about a half hour later that Kael began to wonder what was taking Willow so long. The dollar store was only about five minutes away. Well she probably went into the supermarket they have better choices, Kael thought to himself and went back to enjoy his time with the kiddos.
After an hour had passed from when she left Kael began to think this was a little odd. He didn’t worry too much, just thought he would give her a call and see what the hold up was.
“Hey this is Willow, leave me a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.”
Kael got aggravated, he always hated when he couldn’t get a hold of somebody that he wanted to. He wasn’t mad at the person really he just used to being a phone call away from people. Patience was something that he was learning from his children, not something he was given great amounts of. He then called his parents to see if Willow had stopped by there. She hadn’t. He called his brother’s house same response. Kael was really concerned now, he tried calling Willow one more time and gloriously she answered.
‘Hey sweetie, what’s taking you so long, I was getting worried sick something happened to you. You know how your min gets filled with horrible scenarios.”
“Who is this.” That’s when Kael noticed that the voice on the other end of the call was not Willow’s He was so relieved to hear someone say hello that he didn’t realize it was not Willow.
“Oops I think I may have got the wrong number.” Kael said before thinking, he had called Willow out of his contacts so he hadn’t even typed a number in himself.
“No, no I think you have the right number.” The voice answered back it was a woman and she seemed regretful.
“Is Willow around?”
“Are you her husband or boyfriend?” The voice asked.
“I’m her husband, can you please give her the phone to her now.” Kael was getting a little impatient, who was this person and why would She let Kael talk to Willow.
“I’m so sorry… There has been an accident.”
The voice continued to talk into Kael’s ear, something about car wreck. Didn’t get there in time, she was gone.
It was all a blur to Kael. “I need to come see her, this can’t be true. Where are you.” Turns out she was just under a mile away from the house.
Kael called his parents to come watch the babies. It was as if he was in a daze. Nothing seemed real. Even the very air he was walking through seemed to be thick like jelly. He didn’t real hear what his parents said when they arrived. His answers must’ve been good enough because before long he was in the car making his way to Willow. He hardly noticed that his dad had decided to come with him. It made no difference to him. The ride was short and silent. It took less than five minutes for them to see the lights. It was so strange how festive those ambulance lights look. His stomach was in his feet and everything still felt unreal to him.
He parked and was out of the car in a flash. He was running up to Willow’s car that lay twisted and flipped in the ditch. He was stopped by someone he didn’t know and told that he could go there.
“That’s my baby, that my Willow. Let go of me!” Kael screamed, kael seldom even raised his voice but in this moment he it’s as if he couldn’t say it loud enough.
“I’m so sorry” came the voice of the man holding him back. “She didn’t make it.” Reality struck. The fog of Kael’s mind cleared. His mind finally put the pieces together of what happened. It was very simple and an easy to follow logic that his mind was not letting him realize until that moment. His wife went to get ice-cream on her way home she wrecked her car and she didn’t make it through the accident. He stopped struggling against the man in an instant all his strength was gone. He fell to his knees with his arms slack by his sides. His body must’ve weighed thousands of pounds he was surprised that his very presence was causing the asphalt below hims to crack under the pressure. His back was slumped with the weight of his own shoulders. In that moment on the ground looking at nothing. Everything stopped. The world had stopped. His forever cheated him. His forever was gone. His forever was over. Kael’s eyes were overflowing with tears it was a still cry though. His body was wracked with sobs he didn’t scream why at the sky while shaking his fist. If he could even think of doing something like this it would have been absurd. He didn’t have the energy to lift his head let alone, shake a fist at the sky.
Kael didn’t know how long he sat like that, It was as if life itself had stopped and he had nothing. Half of him had been ripped away from him in an instant, and he knew that the wounds would never heal.